Nicole Thomason's Blog: Jumping on the Sexual Abuse Bandwagon?

I’m going on a rant today about sexual abuse. If this isn’t something you like to read about, you may want to check back on another day.

Anytime I read an article on sexual abuse, sexual assault, molestation or rape I’m always sickened by the comments left by the faces and fingers behind a computer screen. It’s like they have no soul. It’s so easy to spat off stupid shit and then click away to the next article you wanna vomit on. It amazes me how fast people start victim blaming.

These same people are the ones who say, “Geez, I wonder why victims don’t come forward and tell someone or file charges?” Because they’ll be attacked for lying or won’t be believed in the first place.

The most recent one that pissed me off was a comment left on a Kesha article that suggested it seems like so many females seem to be jumping on the “sexual abuse bandwagon” lately. Sexual abuse has been happening all along. It’s just that more people are coming forward because it takes guts. Sexual abuse victims are damned if they do, damned if they don’t.

I don’t know a ton about Kesha’s case (the young pop singer) but it seems that the bulk of it is that she says she was drugged and raped by her producer and on Friday Sony refused to let her out of her contract so now she is forced to continue working with those at Sony (more on that below). In 2011 she spoke under oath and said that her producer has never drugged or sexually abused her. With that said, most people who have never dealt with sexual abuse would probably assume that she never was raped since that’s what she said a few years back. She could have been protecting herself and her producer, out of fear. I look at it as she was afraid to speak up about it because how many people would believe a Sony record producer would sexually abuse his client? If regular ol’ people on the street like you and I aren’t believed, who’s gonna believe a famous pop singer was abused by her own producer?

That’s just two very different possible ways to view it, right?

So many people are jumping to the conclusion that she’s lying to get out of a record contract. That could be true, but why is that the conclusion people jump to? Why do people assume sexual abuse victims are always lying? It’s like they’re guilty of lying until proven otherwise. Why do so many people assume Bill Cosby’s accusers are lying? Is it possible that he could do no wrong? Just because he was “America’s Dad” on a television sitcom? Puh-leeze.

Do you wanna know why people are sexually abused by people they trust? Because the assholes abusing people think they’ll get away with it because who could possibly think they’d take advantage of somebody who holds their trust? This doesn’t happen in every case, but definitely way more often than not!

According to RAINN.org:

Approximately 4 out of 5 sexual assaults are committed by somebody the victim knew.

Forty-seven percent of rapists are a friend or aquaintance of the victim.

Men are raped too (approx. 1 in 33 American men).

My whole purpose for writing this post is to make people think about sexual abuse in a different way.

What if it happened to your sister?

What if it happened to your nephew?

What if your mom was raped?

What if your baby sister was raped?

What if you were raped?

You might feel different about it. You may have more empathy towards the victims and you may not rush to assume they’re lying. It’s easy to bash people, it’s much harder to stand up for people you believe in when a large part of the world is against you. The world needs more people who don’t assume sexual abuse victims are lying. Be one of those people. Help eliminate the shame and fear that people have coming forward with their stories by being supportive instead of judgmental. If that happened, more people would come forward and their abusers would have to face the consequences. If abusers keep thinking they’ll get away with it, it’ll keep happening.

As far as Kesha goes, she is still free to work with another producer under the Sony “umbrella” but if everything she states is true, why would she want to continue to make Sony money if they could care less about her well-being? I can’t say I’d be happy to continue supporting them but I also realize that a contract is a contract. They want what was promised: music that makes them money.

What a crazy world the music industry is. Yuck.

End rant.

XOXO

Mindi

The post Jumping on the Sexual Abuse Bandwagon? appeared first on Lifting Makes Me Happy.